October 1, 2008 marks the beginning of my transition period. It’s been hard for me to connect and feel close because I have been so… just disconnected.
This weekend was extremely hard.
The alarm clock went off at 6:00am on Saturday morning, but I had already been anxiously tossing and turning since 5:30am waiting for the sound of that awful alarm. I jumped out of bed, and began packing my car with the small boxes. My dear friend J made us breakfast, and my sister with Boyfriend arrived and finished packing up my beautiful house.
I went back to clean on Saturday and Sunday, and mopped the floor with tears and soap water.
I knew that moving was going to be hard, but I didn’t realize that it would be this hard. I loved my San Francisco apartment with my great friends in the building. It felt like I had roommates, but my own room. It felt like a home – my home - now it’s all packed up in my sister’s garage, and I’m living out of a suitcase.
It’s a strikingly empty feeling. I’m feeling completely alone, even though, I’m not. In this heavy transition, I find my only comfort is rehearsal.
Goodnight San Francisco, I will miss you deeply.
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