I'm really surprised with how lazy I have become during unemployment. My concept of "time" is all off. I find myself saying things, "I'll put my laundry away later because I have tons of time. Then three days later my laundry is sitting in the basket and it keeps getting transfered from bed to basket to bed to basket, and each time I say to myself - it's ok I have tons of time!
It amazes me how productive I am when every moment of my day has an accountable task and the moment that I don't have anything to do the amount of stress piles up on my wee brain, and I start to buckle and beg for the internet to save me.
I need to get used to this lifestyle. This is the lifestyle that New York will bring me. Is it really difficult to find a lucrative, challenging, mind engaging and flexible job that will allow me to sing on broadway? Yes, yes it is. I have not given up. I will continue to work. I will continue to pursue contracting positions. I will continue to work hard and do what it takes to eat. to save money. to get to New York. I will do what ever it takes, but I have to remind myself that it takes time. I'm all about this instant gratification, and it takes time.
It's difficult to balance the different opportunities that comes across my desk because I am all about instant gratification, and so if a job comes up for 12.50 an hour for the next 5 months - I am inclined to take it, but NO. Take the time to find something that works. See - this is stressful. I can hardly even write about it anymore.
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