Let's Have Dinner Tomorrow

On Thursday, I said, "I got a job! Let's celebrate and drink a bottle of wine tomorrow."

Response: "Great! I'll call you tomorrow."

Thanks to freedictionary.com, I discovered the actual definition of tomorrow is: the day after today. I thought I better second check myself because when you didn't call for the ENTIRE day of Friday, I started to worry that, perhaps, I don't know what tomorrow means. Perhaps, we were speaking a different language and you didn't understand what tomorrow actually entails. I started to wonder, if perhaps, in some cultures tomorrow actually is within a 48 hour period and not 24 hours because in that case, you would be ok, and the fact I seriously stared at my computer screen for 16 hours waiting for your effing phone call would be on me. Please don't think that I was not an active participant in trying to get a hold of you. I called you every fifteen minutes since 5pm on Friday afternoon. Each time I called I thought, "someone is dying right now from a drunk driving accident."

I took a break from computer and wall staring to go to sleep, and OH THEN YOU CALL....at 1am. Technically speaking, that is not tomorrow. 1am on Saturday morning is not the day after today considering we spoke on Thursday.

Something that actually gets me is the fact I instantly felt anger about your no show. I didn't worry that you weren't safe, that maybe you had a car accident, or maybe you were in the hospital. Oh no, I KNEW instantly that you were either sitting at home screening my phone calls or out with other friends. Nevermind, knowing this is my last weekend in San Francisco, and I turned away my other friends who wanted to hang out because I wanted to hang out with you.

The other thing that really gets me. Actually, it eats me alive like a effing parasite in my heart, it's that I put up with it. I have taught you that it's ok to treat me like this. It's ok that you are not doing what you said you were going to do. It's ok that you say you're going to call and then you don't. Don't get me wrong, you're an idiot, but the truth is: I'm the bigger one.