Get Well Soon.

What a week, and it’s only Tuesday.

Misery loves company, and I’m telling you I have been surrounded by tragedy over the past couple of weeks. The Universe is asking me to evaluate my life and reminding me that time is of the essence. Every second counts.

A dear friend recently had an accident that landed him in the hospital for quite sometime, and I feel… I feel… I don’t know how I feel. I think that is my answer to everything these days. I don’t know how I feel just mostly numb. My friend and I were super close for about 2 years. Then without a warning, we slowly but surly drifted apart, and now he’s in the hospital, and I’m not sure how to react. We had recently seen each other a couple of times, and we were defiantly on the way to patching things up, but now this. I’ve acted the only way I know how, which is to be there for him every second that I have, but I just realized just how far I am out of his life. It makes me sad, but I’m still there. I’m still going to the hospital everyday, but he did say yesterday that it gets a little overwhelming because people are there all the time. I don’t want to feel in the way, but I am in the way. I feel like I’m irritating, but I just care. So I’m confused, and feeling messy.

The tragedy does not end. A friend and fellow actor, John Stenger, passed away on Sunday from a massive heart attack. He played the King in Cinderella and was currently rehearsing for ACLO’s production of Grease. It was a complete shock to the ACLO family, and all I can do is stand by and watch my theatre family weep for such an unexpected loss. I JUST saw him on opening night of WSS. I’m glad that I spent the majority of my time catching up with him and chatting to him on the walk over to the gala because it had been almost a year since I had seen him last. November of 2007 was the last time I saw him before WSS. I’m shocked and I’m sad, but mostly I’m shocked.

My friends all around me are grieving, and I’m feeling cranky. Cranky, irritable and grouchy. Is this my way of dealing with all this sadness? All this – well this is part of life?